Herstory II

First, a show announcement. I will be in "Herstory II- A Celebration of Female Artists"" next month, opening February 19th, running until March 13th, at the RRCA. It is quite an honor to be asked to show in this, curated by Liz Nicklus and Rachel Citrino (Rachel was quite taken with my Obsession surreal piece at one time). Liz Nicklus is the director of the Millville Weed and Seed Program, my boss in the program Artworks- she had asked me to participate our first night of Artworks class. I'm in the company of Bobbie Diamond Adams, Terri Amig (whom I am in awe of), the Jaqueline Sandro, and Reta Sweeney.- After some e-mail and jpeg exchange it is decided I will be showing The Shades, this might include Some Lady in Hell with Long Hair- if I want to carry her down the street. Have to see how the wind is. I am excited to be showing The Shades at the RRCA- those Memorial window treatments certainly have made the rounds. They always stir excitement, and I hope fun. I smile quietly. They aren't rivers.

Very cold walk on the way to work tonight, my feet went numb. I brought my camera tonight to show the director a pic of the painting (under painting) I'm doing for the library upstairs. Not many people tonight, too cold. I had a very long talk with my boss the other day- I cried. She spoke to me in a manner not many do, with positivity and energy, about my work. She complimented me- no one compliments me, they are far too ready to criticize. And we discussed a few other things.

I'm going to make a few life changes now, one is to work less hours, the reason for the talk with the boss. Another, and this might sound silly, but at her suggestion, switch coffee shops and get out of the Peyton place I was frequenting. This town is not easy. Stay off Facebook and create a website.

Others would include the gym- that will be my social life. I really enjoyed it the other day, which is kinda funny because I work out in the "guy" section- but this is inspiring me more and more, I love their energy. I've discovered my neighbors leave me feeling lonely- same old gossip, intrusions, conversations- I will get lonely being in my own space if I'm not careful. So it will be off to the gym. Or the tunnel, my wireless headphone haven when creating- I can't hear a thing going on, can only concentrate.

Things will be created as they are. I do feel the pressure to perform (less Facebook for sure), and this thing with a new computer and accessories- it will happen when it happens. There is always the next thing, never the moment. Computer work will happen when it does, then. The fall series beckons, and I have a Center Member show to ready for in the fall.

I am too concerned with other's activities and not paying attention to my own. And I need to pay more attention to the benefits of artistic community instead of otherwise- I have thoroughly enjoyed the Artworks class and three adult female artists having conversations weekly, and the teaching in my watercolor class by a very dedicated female artist- I used to be that way. I know how I lost it. I want it back.

Long enough.

SLOW today

Slow today at work, the rain. So I sketched another fall watercolor. I'm excited- our watercolor class starts Wednesday and we'll have better supplies than what I've been using, real brushes, colors and pressed paper. Marie Natale is teaching the class, she is a member of the NJ Water Color Society, and I think she just went national too. Her work is on exhibition this month in our Witt Gallery (and selling quite well). I hope to get a friendly critique of my sketchbook. She's lively, it should be a fun class. Four three hour studios.

I had an awful dream this morning about work. My dreams are strange, like movies, and I rarely pay attention to them as they usually have something to do with current events in my life. I wake up with an Oh, yea, that.......This morning I pulled out of it shaken to my nerves- in the dream the RRCA had turned into a fast food restaurant, and I could not do anything right, could not do my job. And, no one would help me. I even had problems with my hair. It was horrible. The fast pace was there, the tension, the grease. I remember clearly trying to butter rolls to take to the other art consultant. Oh, I sat bolt upright out of bed and fixed a cup of coffee, shaking. For those of you who know, or don't, I worked ten years in the food industry and once wrote a college paper- "Why I still work for fast food".

It didn't make sense, it did in awhile. It's not my job, no, I love it here. I don't doubt it's partly this blog and this town. What I write does come back to haunt me sometimes, has since I've been writing. Especially in a local "habitat". Yesterday I had stopped for coffee and was questioned twice if I liked it here, and if I was being treated right. Hmmmmmmmm. Libraries were mentioned by my neighbors too shortly after I last wrote.

Ah well, it's a public blog...........

Marie NAtale's exhibition and the latest from my sketchbook.

Back to "normal"

Yea, some would say- what is normal? That is what my boss said to me when I said we were back to normal, watching her hang a show. No more cleaning empty walls- they are now hung with lots of art! This Friday is Third Friday.

Think I'll watch Saw II tonite, horrors! I bought the DVD collection for myself at Christmas as a present, to the dismay of a friend. No amount of explanation would hold- he just couldn't see "someone like me" (painting those peaceful rivers) watching, much less owning a Saw movie. Aren't we all full of surprises sometimes though? Chuckle. I'm sleeping, eating well, exercising, taking my vitamins, losing weight. Today I learned how to transfer files from disk to my new computer. Almost installed the photo program, almost. Went to the gym instead. A relative hoped I could let go of the turmoil the nurse put me through, well. My hands are full. I don't have time for another community, the arts district and RRCA is quite enough. I went to a community meeting here at the apartment building Monday night, left before it finished. They want to create activities- bingo, dances, movie and game nights. I don't have time, I just don't. And now I want privacy when I'm home. They're nibby.

I'm busy. Last night was the beginning of Artworks. It was wonderful. Children creating inspire me and get me going. And to add- there were three of us "teaching"- all women artists, and the conversation about our work stimulated me. I am so thrilled to be doing this.

The director of the Weed and Seed program that runs Artworks asked me to be in a curated exhibition in February- "Herstory"- an annual exhibition of women artists. We will probably choose a Shade or two! Lovely and exciting!

Sunday I took some time to whip out another fall watercolor sketch. I also will be painting an enlargement (24x36) of a little '07 river for the RRCA library, can't wait to pick up a brush on this one!

Happy and busy...........

Zen Moments

I was briefly watching QVC tonite and they were selling flame less candles "for those Zen moments we all want after the holidays and New Years". I had to laugh, could laugh as I had centered myself today, but I'm really not sure how laughable it all is. The holidays. Compounded with a Facebook November high school reunion I almost attended, and the gallery's Annual Artful Giving- ending with our annual closing and renovations during the New Year- it's all quite a ride. Aside from working in a gallery where sales are necessary for our educational programs, after the fact, it all seems a little too commercial, for me, and I think I'll stay off the merry go round next year as much as possible. Facebook is really too much with everyone reporting on shopping and baking and decorating. And I found I wasn't so far off base with my New Years cleaning as I thought- lots of people do after the holidays, organizing and getting rid of stuff.

I had a really upsetting doctors visit this week, very negative I thought, with the nurse I see every three months by state law for my head injury. I was off balance with the holidays and PMS and insomnia, and I explained this, but she didn't take it lightly. I did, this too shall pass. But she was full of gloom and doom and premonition, upsetting me much. Very disturbing for fifteen minutes every three months. I disregard a lot of what she says, she isn't holistic and would rather push pills than vitamin therapy.

I started a diet detox cleanse today, to last a week, began vitamin C for teeth and Valerian for the insomnia. She would prefer I get a sponsor, out of the blue, and go to meetings so others can tell me when I'm off. I knew I was off, I told her! I'm sticking with the diet. I don't have time for more relationships complicating my mind. And I've never been comfortable with the trading of obsessions- if you know what I am saying.

Pilates tonite then, very welcome. I've avoided the gym this week with the new influx of members and new resolutions, will return when it calms.

The RRCA was closed this week but I worked Mon, Tues, Wed, will work Saturday morning- cleaning and painting. I will be glad when work schedule returns to normal- we all will be. Next Tuesday Artworks starts, for 12 weeks where in I am a teacher's aide, I am still teaching Silver Run, and the 20th my watercolor class begins- for four weeks.

The nurse asked if I was motivated. HUH? Another person I sadly shake my head at, and I'll talk to people who know me for longer than fifteen minutes instead..........

Lovely lamp my sister in law gave me for Christmas, ambiance! :)

Finally figured it out

I don't know how to save pics from a media card on this computer, but I can import from my camera with the USB cable, just tried that. Two sample pics then- one- of my oh so cute kittie relaxing on the electric blanket, yes, the one that threw my back out last week. And another- an amusing portrait I did for my son, of one of his friends, for her Christmas. Next (when I get to it), ah, to install my Corel Paint Shop Pro so I can edit. This program is for photos, I have another Corel program for paint/the Wacom. No thousand dollar Adobe for me, can't afford, and if I can't do something with simpler tools- I'm lost.

In good spirits. Have been pain free for a few now, oh so nice. My home is clean and I've moved on to the busy work of educating myself about the laptop and Windows 7. This week too the RRCA is closed- today I went in to paint and clean, tomorrow clean, whatever is needed done thereafter. Don't have to dress for this. Being off a work schedule with the holidays, snow, now our renovations is a bit unnerving. I don't have a routine, flow. And I had the worst insomnia taking the muscle relaxers. Figures, that's my body, at backwards odds with medication. Relaxed insomnia.

A word about resolutions as the subject came up at work today. The subject came up when I stepped outside to have a smoke. "What about the New Year's?!!!!!" everyone asked. Well, what about it? I said I wasn't about to stress myself out. That my resolution this year was to NOT make a resolution. I knew one thing, that my body didn't like all the holiday food I put into it- I just wanted to eat greens again instead of baking fats. Feeling miserably weighted was enough for me to WANT to live healthier. So I have a desire, not a resolution. I also have six months worth of nicotine replacement, and about 12 exercise DVD's. I could lose 30 lbs. Ewwwwww, lose weight and quit smoking, sure, ALL BY NEXT WEEK!!!!!!! YEAH!

I'll let you know what my stats are in June, hows that?...............:).....The holidays were nice. I had a lot of Christmas spirit this year. It was even fun on Facebook. But the day after lost me. So much talk of shopping, STILL. Shake my head. New Year's Eve I fell asleep and woke five to midnight, tired of the holiday hype........

Happy New Year Everyone!

Nope, no New Year's resolutions, I'm too old to set myself up with expectations. Though I do hope to/plan to live as healthily as I can. Christmas cooking left me feeling like I ingested boulders, and I didn't like that at all. Christmas Eve morning the cat woke me by attacking the corner of my bed (she will do this when she thinks it's time to get up....)- I pushed myself up too abruptly (sleeping on my stomach) and severely twisted the right muscle along my spine. So I had a strained swollen muscle (hugs HURT!) and my old back pain returned with a vengeance with the new injury. I spent most of Christmas Eve and Christmas Day in bed. Work Saturday, Sunday and Monday I had to sit with a heating pad. I could barely do anything functional without having to lay down for two hours. Forget sitting at the computer. Finally a neighbor gave me some muscle relaxers, and I've been without the pain for two days now. So that is my New Years joy and celebration- being without pain. I was getting so miserable in the constant pain, it's just awful. I don't know how people live when afflicted with chronic pain.
The RRCA is closed for repairs until the 10th, since the 31st. I've been doing a heavy duty cleaning of my home, updated the bathroom, finished tonite. And now that I can sit at a desk- it's computer time! Learn about my new toy finally- I just haven't time. Hopefully I'll be able to post pics very soon.
Happy New Year Everyone! My best wishes for all!